Tuesday Night:
I was packed, had checked in online, and made my bed so I could slide into its familiar, comforting embrace upon my return, and now I was antsy. I didn't want to stay at home, counting away the minutes until my impending departure, but really had no where else to go. Fuck it, I'll start driving towards North Seattle, someone will have to call me back by the time I've braved I90 traffic and made it to I5... Wrong. After calling everyone who lives in north Seattle and the surrounding area multiple times, I was still left driving around with no place in particular to go. Dammit! Why didn't I take the wardrobe box out of the back of the car before I came up here, it completely blocks my rear view... Oh yeah, it's heavy and I'm weak and girlie. Fine, I'll take it back to , Issaquah to hell with gas prices.
Just as I turn onto I90 from I5, not 1 but 3 people call me. Welllll, too bad, too late now, but I'll see you in about an hour. Oh and Greg, I'm sleeping over at your place tonight, just so you know. Oh, by the way, Kris, we're hanging out tonight at Greg's, just so you know.
Issaquah: Alrighty, I've backed into the garage, so far so good. Popped the trunk... Check. Pull on the wardrobe box... Slide, thunk. Ouch! Damaged... Toe. Bruises. Crash. Yup, that went as planned. Awesome. Back in the car and back towards Seattle.
I was quiet, I wanted to cry. I was certainly not looking forward to the 7 hour plane ride to dreary Florida and having to deal with a hostile army of estranged family. Hurricane Ike was even afraid of the scene waiting for me there and had decided to bypass the state altogether and head for Texas instead. Lucky bastards. 3 tropical storms and/or hurricanes in the vicinity and I can't even get one to come visit me in Florida as a distraction. Really? Yes, really Jaime, no hurricanes for you.
After picking up Kris, we headed to Panera Bread for a late lunch. Mmmm, creamy tomato soup in a sourdough bread bowl. The day was looking up, tomato soup makes everything better, much like bacon or chai tea. Or monkeys, but they're not for eating. Still sad, but talk of books and movies and life in general was starting to make me feel better. After much dallying, we decided it was time to invade Greg's, so off we went.
Right, everything is unloaded and sitting nicely in Greg's apartment.
Is your printer hooked up? I need to print out my boarding pass...
Riiiighhhht... About that, it doesn't actually work any more, sorry.
I look at Kris. Forget it, he hasn't had a working printer... Well ever. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. Ring... Ring...
This is Justin.
Do you have a printer that works? I need to print some stuff out before I leave.
Sure, put Greg on first, I want to bequeath some stuff to him.
Fine. Babble.
I'm heading over.
I get to the place that had been home but is no longer my safe haven. Goddammit! I hate guru gadget guys who have two monitors set up with one mouse that runs back and forth between them. Freaks me out every damn time. Print damn you print! Justin is rustling around, putting together some stuff for me to take back to Greg's.
Really? You're giving him the Venezuela picture from Myles?
Well, yeah.
But it was a gift to both of us!
Well, I think Myles will be hurt if I didn't keep it.
What!?! You're giving it to Greg!
Yeah, but, he's only holding it for me.
Whatever.
Oh, can you cancel the cable and internet while you're here? It's in your name.
Fine. But I need to do this quick, I want to get back.
Just my luck... My representative is named Charity, and she's a talker.
Blah blah blah cancel blah blah blah I'm not paying attention blah blah blah. She mentions baseball, which catches my attention. Somehow the Yankees are brought up and I find myself blurting out, "Fucking Yankees!" I can't help it, it's like a Pavlovian response.
"Well, the Yankees aren't that bad"
Wow, I didn't think you could plummet any further in my opinion at this stage, but you've just sunk to new and undiscovered depths. I disagree firmly yet politely.
"Well, what about the Stellers?" Wow. Really? Wrong sport.
"Ok, I'll give you that one" I grit through my teeth, anything to make this phone call end.
Fine, done, canceled. Have a good evening!
Now I'm in a mood, a don't look at me or I"ll rip your testicles out through your ear type of mood. Ok Justin, grab the stuff I'm taking over to Greg's, I want to go now.
Um, I'm still getting it together.
What the hell were you doing while I was listening to Charity yammer away about sweet fuck all?
Ummmm, I don't know
*&%$^#&* &^^%$)*%%$ $#!@@#$%
*&%$^#&* &^^%$)*%%$ $#!@@#$%
I'm going to go move the car around front, I'll meet you there.
5 minutes pass.
Ring... Ring... Are you going to be down anytime soon?
Well you took off before I was ready.
I ASKED YOU IF YOU WANTED ME TO MOVE THE CAR AROUND FRONT.
Well I have all this stuff.
Do you want me to come up and help you carry it down? This said in my, "I'm talking to a retarded 4 year old" voice.
That would be awesome.
WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY THAT I screamed in my head.
Trip, crash, bruises, bang, OUCH. Fuck fuck fuck.
What's your problem?
All I wanted to do was come over and print out my fucking boarding pass and now I've been turned into cable canceling messenger girl. I JUST WANT TO GO BACK TO GREG'S!!!
Thwap. He opens the hatchback and starts throwing stuff in.
Just don't talk he snaps.
I'll snap you I think.
Everything is loaded.
Bye.
Bye.
Angry music. Driving fast. Tears of absolute frustration and blind anger.
Pull into a spot outside of Greg's place.
Pull out my phone to call the boys to come help me haul in all this crap.
New Text Message Received From: Justin
Great, what now.
Thanks for canceling the cable and bringing all this stuff over to Greg's.
Sigh.
Sorry for terrorizing you. Xx
Greg and Kris come out and we bring everything inside. The plant I'm carrying bites me twice, drawing blood the second time. I try to set it on fire with my Eye Lasers of Doom. Hmm, haven't quite perfected that skill yet.
New Text Message Received from: Justin
Haha, ok.
I want to cry again, this time from a place deep in my soul that I'm still afraid to investigate.
No comments:
Post a Comment